STAY: TIME OUT
By definition:
We constantly are in a place of action. Stay literally means to STOP without giving into the urge of moving, avoiding, or running to find a solution for a current problem, and be an active listener when the body and mind are still. This practice of STOPPING pauses the flight or fight responses and creates a space for us to assess all of who we are within ourselves. The most sane position of our heart-mind-body is to remember, nothing to do, nowhere to go.
We wake up this morning to the usual alarms of quick, loud, and sharp bells. Before we can get our morning stretch and yawn in, our mind had started the usual chatter: “Today’s events: Do this! Go There! OH NO! What’s today? I can’t be late! Shoot, I forgot to do x-y-z. Damn, I am not organized!” Doing so, we jump OUT of whatever we were doing, like stretching, yawning, or taking time to log dreams, to get ahead or create an issue to distract ourselves with.
This is constant for most of us, something happens and we react. Most of the time we react by running away or running to it. Instead of taking the time to stop and stay center within ourselves, we tend to pour energy, outwardly, to find a solution to keep us feeling “balanced.”
In a world of busyness, we are torn away from internal self check-ins, where we are able to just stop, sit, and be WITHOUT having to do more than that. Our egos separate our bodies from emotions to avoid feeling pain and discomfort. Because we don’t allow ourselves to see the full picture, we tend to problem solve by both end of extremes. On one side, we cling to what we already know or attach to false certainty and reject change. On the other, we run towards everything and anything that will distract us from this unfamiliar frightening feeling.
We often repeat these behaviors while expecting different results.
Often times, we fill our gas tanks with societal and personal ideologies to go above and beyond which can lead to exhaustion, negativity, and resentment. With this constant forward motion, we miss the opportunity of rest in stillness — the place where we are able to evaluate, make sense of it all, and create new, healthier habits.
The goal when “staying” is to sit, breathe, and connect WITHOUT the act of running to a solution or pushing away grief, anger, excitement, etc. When we sit in the full energy of whatever is there and actively listen to our internal dialogue, feel the comfort and uncomfortableness, and be present with our senses or fully understand where it is coming from.
This practice slows us down and eventually keeps us from pushing ourselves towards quick fixes and fleeting solutions.
Stay literally means to stop and pay attention to our internal and external presence. STAY techniques slow our running, driven lives, long enough to give us the space to re-join ourselves. When we breathe and reflect in an organized way, we re-join our bodies to our emotions; emotions to our spirits; spirits to our minds. We are most alive when we understand there’s no escape from the present moment.
STAY and we find what is actually happening to our physical bodies. We find where we may be holding too tight; where we stress, un-resolved issues, injuries of all kinds that can make us sick, weary, or scared. STAY and we become more aware and give an outlet to the feelings that we may have never acknowledged or pushed into silence. We are most alive when we understand there’s no escape from the present moment.
Below are some exercises that give you an opportunity to practice the art of “staying.”
