QUESTION DEFINITION OF SELF

**By definition:**
Someone else decides who we are the moment we are born. As soon as we enter the world, we are told we are the first or third child; we will play football or be a dancer; we have tenacity to become a lawyer, etc. We get set on that pathway to achieve the identity that others, like your parents, have defined for us. We are stamped with something that has nothing to do with who WE really are. It is essential to find our True Self and the qualities that best define us or else we go about the world under a false identity. That false identity dictates our values and how we live our lives.

Can You Relate?

We may have heard, “She’s smart. He’s quiet but aware. He’s the winner, artist, and athlete in the family. She needs help no matter what. Oh, that one? Thank God she’s beautiful because she has no brains, but the other twin is a genius.”

What about suffering from a chronic illness? Sometimes we hear, “Yes, she’s well for now but…” or “I would like to hang out but I am a caretaker and someone needs to be with him.” We constantly define sick people and adjust their reality around that one identity. In doing so, guilt is felt on their behalf for limiting others and themselves.

How about our own internal pressures to live up to what society portrays as “success,“ such as the number of followers on social media, money, accolades, etc. We are consciously and subconsciously molding and shifting our own personal interests, wants, needs, doubts, and fears around the collective of other’s opinions. It’s the World’s way to categorize, identify, bring order, and provide opportunity to place blame.

Why Question The, “Self?”

We identify ourselves by words we’ve learned from others, typically in childhood. We are not the person we think we are. We are so much more than we know. Who we think we are now was defined, discussed, processed, and blended together by forces we didn’t know existed; it was beyond our control. We believed them because they were told by authority figures and people we depended on to stay alive. They told us who we were, how we behaved, what we were good at and what we were not.

The greatest journey of our lives is to find our true self. The qualities that best define us have to be in our OWN control because otherwise we live off the definition that other people have given us. That is always a false identity because it is based on someone else’s value and description of us, not who we really are.

Choice is limited and expanded by identity. Who we are becomes what we believe and what we do.

How Do We Benefit From Questioning Definition of Ourself?

genuine version of our true self, we must live by our OWN positive definitions. We need to recognize when environmental fear, trauma, doubt, uncertainties creep into our lives. We should work towards overcoming any physical and emotional limiting beliefs it can create. When we do so we are able to discover qualities that are innate to our character like empathy, patience, compassion, trust, and so forth. Once aware, we are able to embrace the qualities which creates our belief system of who we ACTUALLY are.

Finding our true self and the qualities we internally align with allows us to break down any false identities. When we are aware of any false identities we are able to find value and have full control over how we carry ourselves in life. CHOICE is limited or expanded by identity. Who we are becomes what we do! When we work towards hearing and evaluating the way negative metaphors construct our inner & outer world, we can deconstruct those exact same words and absorb the deeper meanings of our true self. To live a

Practice “Questioning The Self”

Below are some exercises that give you an opportunity to practice the art of “questioning our definition of ourselves.”